The Secret Diary of Joe Biden

Meeting the Chinese Vice President

Wednesday, January 19th
2:00pm

Dear Diary,

I am so excited that I will have the opportunity to meet the Vice President of China. I hope me and Hu Jintao can be friends. This is the guy who will one day - around 2012 - be the President of the whole country. Oh man, it would be great to find someone who is just like me - professionally, anyway. I wonder what this meeting will bring. I am hoping that with our friendship we can create a coalition to prevent Global Warming, but, we will see.

Until next time,

Joe, the most powerful person in the world next to Obama. Read more about Meeting the Chinese Vice President

Governors' Scandalous Appointments

Thursday, February 5th
8:00pm

Dear Diary,

I’ve been a little annoyed at the focus on the scandalous Senate appointments by Governor Rod Blagojevich and Governor David Paterson. Yes, it’s true that those ended terribly and cost the Democratic party as well as Kirsten Gillibrand and Roland Burris a portion of their reputations by association. But the public is completely overlooking the fact that Governor Minner of Delaware was commended on her successful and very smooth appointment of Ted Kaufman, my closest advisor and longest-serving aide from when I was a senator. But, of course, people only remember the negative.

I understand why Democratic Senator Russ Feingold of Wisconsin has introduced the amendment to end appointments to the Senate by governors, and I think that a “special election” is certainly the most democratic way to conduct these matters. But it’s of great annoyance that the successful appointments are so often overlooked. Read more about Governors' Scandalous Appointments

Karl Rove Finally Subpeoned

Wednesday, February 4th
9:30pm

Dear Diary,

Well, I am just loving watching Karl Rove have to squirm with this subpoena. It’s quite hilarious that he’s declaring “Executive Privilege” for members of the Executive Branch against the current executive branch. And now their saying he might get indicted because of all this! It’s wonderful to see that guy finally have pay for all of his crimes. I can’t believe it’s taken this long, but better late than never. I would absolutely love to see Dick Cheney and George Bush have to pay for their crimes, but who knows if that will actually happen.

In other news, I can’t believe I messed up the swearing-in ceremony for Hillary Clinton. I suppose I had it coming, what with my remark about Chief Justice John Robert’s memory. We all got a good laugh over that one later when we weren’t in front of the television cameras.

Until next time,
Joe the Veep Read more about Karl Rove Finally Subpeoned

We Can See the Veep's House Again!

Tuesday, January 27th
9:35am

Dear Diary,

Just watched a couple clips from various television shows to start my morning on a good note. And I could hardly believe it – the Vice President’s house in Washington D.C. was on almost every news program! When google maps started taking satellite pictures of everybody’s homes from the Naval Observatory, Dick Cheney refused to allow his house to appear on the internet. So it was pixilated. Even the White House has remained un-pixelated throughout this time. but that’s Dick Cheney for you.

At any rate, when asked if I wanted to continue this veil of secrecy by pixelating my own home, I of course said no! After all, this administration is all about reversing the policies of those in the Bush Administration. And for me, it started with google maps. I’m just glad that people can finally see this home. After all, it is a public point of interest.

Until next time,
Joe the Veep Read more about We Can See the Veep's House Again!

Get Over It!

Monday, January 26th
9:55pm

Dear Diary,

People (well, mostly bloggers) are saying I’m being “gloomy” when it comes my predictions about Afghanistan. Well, look folks, I’m being honest. If anything, people should be happy to finally have a government who isn’t filled with selfish crooks and liars. They should be glad to know about what’s really going on. I’m sure the public is still in a state of shock over the economy. After all, like Afghanistan, it looks like it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets any better.

Still, I’m looking forward to the day when people don’t completely balk at everything I say. Man, you know, that John McCain really did a number on me during the campaign season. But who’s in the White House now? People will get back on track soon, I’m sure… realizing who’s actually fighting for their best interests. I have faith in the resilience and good sense of the American people. They’ve already given Barack and me the jobs, now hopefully they’ll stop freaking out over the little details and focus on the bigger picture. Read more about Get Over It!

Reflections on the Big Day

Wednesday, January 21st
5:45pm

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was such a wonderful day. I really just had the best time. While we were getting ready for the ceremony, Malia asked me to take a picture looking out across the National Mall. I did have a better view, and was only too glad to take the picture. The rest of the day went well, and it was a lot of fun to go to a couple of the Inauguration Balls with Jill, who looked absolutely gorgeous in her red dress. It certainly was fun to get to parade around with her. And I’ll admit that I felt lucky not to be the Obamas, who had to go to 10 balls in 7 hours. I guess they didn’t even get to relax in the White House until after 3 in the morning. How exhausting! Read more about Reflections on the Big Day

Today's the Big Day!

Tuesday, January 20th
6:30am

Dear Diary,

Can’t believe today is the big day!

I can’t pretend that I’m not sad it’s not me taking the oath for the presidential office. But in a way, I’m relieved to know that the weight of the world is more prominently placed on Barack’s shoulders. And I’m always glad to finally have someone in the White House who can hopefully affect some positive change for us all.

Slip-up on the part of Jill yesterday on the Oprah show… Oops. Sorta had to just smile and move on when she made that comment about how I was offered both the Vice-Presidency and the office of the Secretary of State. Sure it was true, but it didn’t look so good for Hillary to get my rejected position. Oh well. At least I got first pick. And now everyone knows that. In truth, I know I would have been good at being the Secretary of State as well. And most people now that, especially with my work on the Senate Committee on Foreign Relations. But Jill and I agreed it was best to take on the role of Vice President. And so here I am. Read more about Today's the Big Day!

Day at the Lincoln Memorial

Sunday, January 18th
11:00pm

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was an amazing day and very touching day. Barack and I started out by visiting the Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington, VA in order to pay our respects to the many brave men and women who have served our country. It was so emotionally moving that Barack and I simply could not speak. There are so many soldiers being honored there, I could feel all my emotions welling from within at the thought of all the men and women who have sacrificed their lives for our country. I can’t help but know that it is not only for the American men and women here today, but those who have passed on as well.

Following that emotional event, Barack and I went to the Lincoln Memorial, which was awe-inspiring, to say the least. Anyone there could sense the excitement, the emotion, the communal togetherness. I bet even those watching the event on television could sense the energy in an around that mall. Read more about Day at the Lincoln Memorial

Restoring the Balance

Saturday, January 17th
9:00am

Dear Diary,

I am proud of my interview yesterday with The New York Times. After all that Dick Cheney has put this country through, I’m sure everyone (including myself) will be relieved to finally have a vice-president who does not overstep his bounds.

Cheney has hurt our country in so many ways, from falsely claiming that Saddam Hussein was connected to Al Qaeda, to illegally wiretapping US citizens. In addition, he denies any responsibility for the economic downfall that has devastated America and much of the world, and continues to brush off new revelations about torture at Guantánamo, saying that everything they did was legal. The guy is unbelievable! And it’s true – I don’t know one person, Democrat or Republican, who isn’t glad to see him go. Cheney was the linchpin in everything that was dishonest about this presidency, it’s amazing he hasn’t been indicted for more crimes, and even impeached.

Cheney can mock me all he likes. Read more about Restoring the Balance

Complete Denial

Friday, January 16th
11:15pm

Dear Diary,

Usually past presidents have ended their presidencies on somewhat positive notes. At least they try to have a farewell conference that seemed to reaffirm most people’s suspicions – that Bush is in an incredible state of denial.

He talked about having kept America safe since September 11th and all that. He even said, “Every morning, I received a briefing on the threats to our nation. I vowed to do everything in my power to keep us safe.” Um, everything? I can’t help but remind Bush that he had been president for eight months before 9/11. And he had completely ignored the warnings that could have prevented that horrific attack on our people. Did he do everything to prevent this attack? Read more about Complete Denial

Joe's Journal: In which the VP is giddy with his Second Most Powerful Person status

Account

Meeting the Chinese Vice President

Governors' Scandalous Appointments

Karl Rove Finally Subpeoned

We Can See the Veep's House Again!

Get Over It!

Reflections on the Big Day

Today's the Big Day!

Day at the Lincoln Memorial

Restoring the Balance

Complete Denial

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