Monday, December 1st
4:48pm

Dear Diary,

I’ve just talked to Barack about specifying my role publicly. I mentioned that this is really embarrassing that I’ve been completely ignored since the election, and that all the other presidents have clarified their Vice Presidents’ roles within the first few weeks. Unfortunately, this rant ended with me saying, “I want some real power, man, and I want it NOW! And I want you to make sure the rest of the WORLD knows how much power I have!!” I may have gotten a little overwrought.

But Barack, maintaining his stoic countenance as always, told me that he was actually saving this address for last, as it would be his best one. He further tried to reassure me that he would “do everything in his power” to get this going as soon as possible. Everything in his power? What does that even mean?! Does he basically have absolute power to make whatever announcements he wants? Ugh, if anything, I’m the one who’s lacking in power. And it’s not like I want to go all Dick Cheney on the country or anything.

I am becoming increasingly concerned that I really am going to be lost in the shadows of Barack and Hillary. Everyone knows that she’s really going to take charge with her role in Secretary of State, and I certainly don’t want to become a spare wheel in this administration; which is why Barack needs to get going on clarifying my role. Not only so I can do it, but so that I can defend it!

Until next time,
Joe the Veep