Tuesday, December 16, 2008
8:30pm

Dear Diary,

Barack and I are not friends. I can’t believe how he humiliated me in front of those kids. As if he really has to impress them. Come on! A bunch of fourth graders won’t be voting for another eight years or so. Why on earthy does he think has to impress them? The kids were just talking about what they’re learning in school. One kid raised his hand to announce, “Decimals.” So Barack has to blurt, “Decimals! Wow, Joe doesn’t even know his decimals.” What a cheap shot.  I would never come back with some bit talking about Barack’s fractions, or something like that.

Honestly, it’s ridiculous. And it’s not like I need a bad rep when it comes to my capabilities in the White House. If anything, I need to be proving that I’m capable, since my responsibilities as a Vice-President have been few and far between, at best.

Of course, I can’t complain, or say anything about this. They’ve even hired a Director of Communications for me,  since apparently I can’t be trusted to say anything on my own. these BIden gaffes are ridiculous, and definitely taken way out of context. Not to mention it’s a slap in the face to have the same guy who said that I “shoot from the hip” and “say the wrong thing at the wrong time.” Jay Carney may be a smart guy. And I’ll admit, I think it’s clever that they put in the same guy who once insulted my public speaking abilities. I’d rather just be my own Director of Communications, though I suppose that’s not an option.

Until next time,
Joe the Veep